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Tag Archives: dirty christmas jokes

20 Knock Knock Christmas Jokes

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Pudding Pudding who? Pudding in your face! Knock Knock Who’s there? Snow Snow who? Snow business like show business! Knock knock! Who’s there? Hanna Hanna who? Hanna partridge in a pear tree! Knock knock! Who’s there? Holly Holly who? Holly-days are here again! Knock knock! Who’s there? Harold Harold who? Hark the Harold Angels Sing! Sean: ...

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15 Santa Jokes In English

When asked about his job, Frosty always replies, “There’s no business like snow business.” Warped Wiseman wonders: “Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’?” Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog? Brandon: I give up. Trey: Frostbite. Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Mark: Dunno. Why? Josh: Because he had ...

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5 Funny Christmas Stories

The funniest face looked out at me From a silver ball On the Christmas Tree.At first I thought It was Santa’s elf, But I looked again and It was just myself. A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, “I thought she wanted one of those ...

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15 Snowman Jokes

What does Frosty like to put on his icebergers? Chilly sauce! What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle. What do you call a snowman in the tropics? Where do snowmen go to dance? Q: What kind of math do Snowy Owls like? A: Owlgebra. Q: What do you call a snowman with a six pack? A: ...

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16 Christmas Jokes Or Riddles

What kind of bird can write? A. A pen-guin What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective ? A. Santa Clues! What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? A. It’s Christmas, Eve. Q: Name the child’s favorite Christma king? A: A stocking. Q: What do call Santa when he stops moving? A: Santa Pause! How ...

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10 Joke Xmas Presents

“Christmas is in my heart twelve months a year and thanks to credit cards, it’s on my Visa card statement twelve months a year also.” If you see a fat man… Who’s jolly and cute, wearing a beard and a red flannel suit, and if he is chuckling and laughing away, while flying around in a miniature sleigh with eight ...

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10 Funny Santa Jokes

Christmas is a baby shower that 
went totally 
overboard. The holiday 
season:
a deeply religious 
time that each of us 
observes, in his own way, by going to the 
 mall of his choice. Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog? Brandon: I give up. Trey: Frostbite. Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Mark: ...

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15 Christmas Cracker Jokes

What do you call a line of men waiting for a haircut? A barberqueue Why was the turkey in the pop group? Because he was the only one with drumsticks! What does a frog do if his car breaks down?  He gets it toad away. What lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers? A nervous wreck. What does Miley ...

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10 Christmas Jokes For Kids

Amanda: What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a knight? Robert: What? Amanda: One slays the dragon, and the other’s draggin’ the sleigh. What do you call Santa when he stops moving? — Santa Pause. This year even the toys are stressed out! — Yeah, they came already wound up. What did the gingerbread man put on his bed? — A cookie ...

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12 Christmas Jokes For Adults

Mike walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. The barmaid looks at the creature and asks the man what he calls it.’Tiny’, answers Mike. ‘Why’s that?’ enquires the barmaid. ‘Because he’s my newt’ concludes Mike. What do snowmen wear on their heads?
 Ice caps! Q: What did the stamp say to the Christmas card? A: Stick with ...

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