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10 Short Funny Christmas Poems

  1. Christmas SpoilersThe Christmas spoilers
    Will soon be with us again
    And that as you well know
    Means the bloody children

    By Unknown Author

    Read source at : http://www.peculiar-poetry.com/paul-curtis short/christmas-poems/

  2. Come, SantaOnce upon a time,
    I made a wish while holding a dime,
    “I wish Santa come here on Christmas Put something special on my socks”.
    So every night,
    I watch out for Santa,
    Waiting for a huge guy with huge belly to show up.
    Then one night, my wish came true.
    I saw someone huge near on my socks,
    Putting something there,
    I was shocked it was my DAD!

    By Unknown Author

    Read source at: http://christmas.365greetings.com/christmas-poems/funny-christmas-poems.html | Christmas Celebrations

  3. Santa Claus’s VisitWith a click and a clack
    And a great big pack,
    Down through the chimney,
    Pretty nimbly
    Somebody comes on Christmas eve!If we are real nice
    And as still as mice,
    If we never peep,
    And are sound asleep,
    He’ll fill our stockings, I do believe!

    And when we arise
    Next day our eyes
    Will grow big to see
    How perfectly
    He knew what we all wished to receive!

    By Susie M. Best

    Read source at : http://www.reindeerland.org/christmas-poems/santa-claus-visit.htm

  4. The Queen’s SpeechThe Queen it would appear
    Gets a TV special every year
    But one of my many queries
    Is why does she never get a series?

    By Unknown Author

    Read source at : http://www.peculiar-poetry.com/paul-curtis short/christmas-poems/

  5. A wife hit her husband with a frying pan
    “What was that for? said he
    “I found this paper in your pocket
    It’s got the name Jenny on it, see!”
    “Oh that. I put a bet on a race last week
    Jenny was the name of my horse” he said
    Next day his wife, armed with frying pan again
    Said “Now buddy you’re dead”
    He said ”What now, woman..
    Are you still on that moan?”
    His wife said “ Yes, I bloody am!!!
    And by the way, your horse is on the phone

    By Jon Bratton

    Read source at : http://www.verses4cards.co.uk/short-funny-rhyming-poems.html

  6. I’d like a stocking made for a giant,
    And a meeting house full of toys,
    Then I’d go out in a happy hunt
    For the poor little girls and boys;
    Up the street and down the street,
    And across and over the town,
    I’d search and find them everyone,
    Before the sun went down.

    By Eugene Field

    Read source at : https://merrychristmas2016-wishes.com/short-christmas-funny-poems-for-kids.html

  7. The funniest face
    looked out at me
    From a silver ball
    On the Christmas Tree!
    At first I thought
    It was Santa’s elf,
    But I looked again and
    It was just myself!

    By Anon

    Read source at : https://merrychristmas2016-wishes.com/short-christmas-funny-poems-for-kids.html

  8. Cool YuleLast day of school,
    Kids say “that’s cool”
    Angel’s wings
    Shepherd brings
    Presents for Jesus
    Rudolf sneezes
    Everything is frosting over
    Even my car made by “Rover”
    Reindeer fly
    But I can’t fly
    But I have cream on my
    Hot mince pie
    But I still get a lift
    When I get a gift

    By Paul Curtis

    Read source at : http://www.funny-poems.co.uk/christmas/x06-yule.asp

  9. Christmas PostMildred went to the post office
    To buy stamps for her Christmas cards
    “What denomination do you want?”
    She was asked by Mr Everard
    “That’s political correctness gone mad,
    Has it come to this?” said she
    “You’d better give me a book of Catholic
    And a book of C of E”

    By Paul Curtis

    Read source at : http://www.funny-poems.co.uk/christmas/x05-yule.asp

  10. Christmas Snow
    There is one thing you have to know;
    At Christmas time, it has to snow.
    The ground must fill with fluffy white
    To soften up the cold, dark night.It helps out Santa, that white snow,
    Reflecting off the moonlight glow.
    It makes us feel so snug instead
    When we’re inside our soft, warm bed.Although this image is so true
    And makes much sense to me and you,
    We have to pause and say, “Ahem –
    There’s rarely snow in Bethlehem.”

    If this thought sets you aback,
    Don’t let it take you off your track.
    For when you spy a shining star,
    It’s Christmas time right where you are.

    By Denise Rodgers

    Read source at : http://www.funny-poems-for-free.com/funny-christmas-poems.html

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