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15 Santa Jokes In English

  1. When asked about his job, Frosty always replies, “There’s no business like snow business.”
  2. Warped Wiseman wonders: “Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’?”
  3. Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
    Brandon: I give up.
    Trey: Frostbite.
  4. Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?
    Mark: Dunno. Why?
    Josh: Because he had low elf esteem!
  5. Children: This turkey tastes like an old sofa!
    Mom: Well, you asked for something with plenty of stuffing!
  6. As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?” The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped, “Didn’t you get my E-mail?”
  7. I think Christmas is near! Because i see a ho! ho! ho!
  8. What do you call buying a piano for the holidays? Christmas Chopin.
  9. Q: What do you get from sitting on the snow too long? A: Polaroids!
  10. Q: What’s an ig? A: A snow house without a loo!
  11. One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”His wife asked, “How do you know?”“Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
  12. Colton: How does a sheep say “Merry Christmas”?
    Tammi: How?
    Colton: “Fleece Navidad!”
  13. How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer “Olive”? Olive? Yeah, you know, “Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names”
  14. Believe it or not, there are still some people who believe in Santa Claus. Scientists call them Democrats.
  15. Why is Santa so fat? He ate too many Ho-ho’s…

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