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10 Funny Santa Jokes

  1. Christmas is a baby shower that 
went totally 
overboard.
  2. The holiday 
season:
a deeply religious 
time that each of us 
observes, in his own way, by going to the 
 mall of his choice.
  3. Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
    Brandon: I give up.
    Trey: Frostbite.
  4. Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?
    Mark: Dunno. Why?
    Josh: Because he had low elf esteem!
  5. A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.
    After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, “I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles.”
    “She did,” he replied. “But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?”
  6. How many ears has Captain Kirk got?
    Three: the left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear.
  7. Man: I’ll have the steak and kiddley pie, please.
    Waiter: I think you mean steak and kidney?
    Man: That’s what I said, diddle I?
  8. The 3 stages of man: 1) He believes in Santa Claus.
    2) He doesn’t believe in Santa Claus.
    3) He IS Santa Claus!
  9. What do you get if you team Santa with a detective?
    Santa Clues!
  10. What did the reindeer say before launching into his comedy routine?
    This will sleigh you.

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